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Dating different people at the same time is actually not that uncommon. After all, you might be interested in more than one person and need time to get to know them all to figure out who you want to be with.
People sometimes confuse this with polyamory, which means that you’ll be romantically and sexually involved with several people. Dating multiple people is somewhat similar in the sense that you’re seeing more than one person, but it’s mostly about figuring out which person you’re most attracted to and/or compatible with.
Granted, you might not want a relationship with any of the people you’re dating, but it’s still important to know the rules to follow to save everyone from unnecessary hurt.
1. Think about why you want to date multiple people.
If you’re interested in more than one person and want to see where things might lead with each of them, there’s nothing wrong with that! There’s also nothing wrong with just wanting to have some fun.
However, your motive shouldn’t be that “everyone is doing it.” If you want to date several people, by all means, go ahead! But make sure that you’re doing it because you genuinely want to, not because someone else is doing it or because you’re trying to avoid commitment with any of them due to past hurts.
Some valid reasons include looking for the right person that you can have a future with, not being in a place where you want to commit to only one person, not wanting a committed relationship (out of choice, not because you’ve got commitment issues), or wanting an open relationship.
All of this is okay, but it needs to be okay with everyone involved, which brings us to one of the most important rules you should follow…
2. Be honest with everyone.
Rest assured that the people you’re dating don’t want the details, but they do want the truth, and they deserve it. So, don’t hide the fact that you’re dating multiple people. Be honest with everyone and let them know that you’re still seeing what’s out there.
Letting someone believe that you’re exclusive even though you’re not is simply wrong. Don’t let them get that impression. Open up about dating multiple people.
This can be a weird conversation for a first date, but surely there’ll be an opportunity to say it casually, and the sooner the better. You should also be honest about your goal. Are you looking to choose a person you’ll be serious with, or are you looking for an open relationship?
Do you want something casual or do you wish to meet the future mother/father of your children? Are you looking for commitment, or are you afraid of it?
All the people you’re dating should be aware of the end goal of the dating process. So, talk about your relationship goals and be open about your intentions to save everyone from unnecessary pain.
3. Respect everyone’s privacy.
While all the people you’re dating deserve the truth, they certainly don’t want to hear too much about each other. So, being honest with them doesn’t mean that you should share the details of a date you had with one person when you’re on a date with the other person.
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